Six With Sticks

by Six Kennedy kids and their parents

Author Archives: davekenn


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Great Day in Sports

A few weeks ago, a man saw Liz and I playing catch and was very impressed with her skills.  He’s associated with SkyWalkers club and wants Elizabeth to play there.  He asked her to play in the Catonsville fall league.  It’s a league for kids a few years older than Liz.  She said yes.  This morning, after she spent the night out at the Baecks, she was a little nervous about playing with the older girls (grades 5-8, she’s the only 4th grader).

But, when she stepped on the field, she did very well.  She scored 2 goals.  On one of the goals, she was tripled teamed, brought the ball out, juked all three and created an open lane to the goal for herself.  It was very pretty, and many of the parents clapped.  Marcia and I are very proud.

We are also worried.  There are a ton of politics in Catonsville sports, and we’ve been hearing the ugly side of everything lately.  I fear that Liz will not get her fair shot, and that Eden will also get her share of the shaft.  Parents in this town are behaving poorly, very poorly, and I want to protect my daughters from all of the nonsense.  I fear that I won’t be able to.

Also today, Liz’s field hockey team played the war hawks.  Last year, the war hawks crushed every Catonsville team.  Today, we beat them 11-0.  Liz had a goal and she played very hard.

Eden played field hockey tonight as well and had a goal.  Go Edie!

Noah played soccer yesterday with Jack.  They play for Jack’s dad’s team.  We are so pleased with Mike’s coaching, and the fun that Noah is having with his friend.  They won 4-0, and Noah had a break away goal.  It was great.

I am so proud.  They are enjoying sports, and they are excelling.  Elizabeth works as hard as any kid I know.  I have a feeling that the others will as well as they get older.

Luke got his own lacrosse sticks today.  PopPop and Grammy brought them over for his first birthday present.  And he had fun with me on the floor, throwing balls to me, holding his stick, and putting the ball in the pocket of my stick.

“My first conscious memory was of my father crazy gluing a putter in my hand” – Tiger Woods (impersonator) – SNL sketch


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Homeward Bound

For the last three days, I’ve been in St. Louis. First time to St. Louis or Missouri in general. I visited the Gateway Arch. And I crossed the Mississippi into Illinois. St. Louis is a city that celebrates exploration and discovery. Lewis and Clark embody the spirit and the push to the West.

Dave under Gateway Arch. St. Louis, Missouri


I was here for a conference. I gave a presentation, did well, and felt very comfortable presenting. Afterwards, a vendor approached me to do a webinar for his company. That felt good.

Dave atop Gateway Arch


All in all tough, this has been an empty three days. I miss my wife. I miss my children. These trips do nothing for me anymore. I do not seek out companionship. I typically eat alone and retire early. This trip no different.

Now I’m at the airport blogging. I found myself singing an old Simon and Garfunkel tune. Homeward Bound, I wish I was. Home, where my thoughts are escaping. Home, where my music’s playing. Home, where my love lies waiting silently for me.

I’m coming home!


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Soothsayer

For the last few weeks, Eden has been really upset about death.  She doesn’t want to die.  She doesn’t want mom or dad to die.  She is really struggling with these concepts and is afraid of them.  I think her actions are a real sign of her intelligence.

When she gets upset, she says that there is going to be an earthquake and a hurricane and she doesn’t want mom or dad to die.

Well, today, there was an earthquake.  Centered in VA, it registered 5.9 on the Richter scale.  It shook the house, knocked pictures off the wall, and opened a bunch of cabinets and drawers.  The worst earthquake to hit MD in over 100 years.

This weekend, there is supposed to be a hurricane, Irene.

Are these things coincidence?  Does Edie have some serious intuition or sixth sense that we don’t know about?


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Luke’s surgery

For days, I couldn’t sleep. We’ve had money problems that I’ve been very stressed about. But that wasn’t it. I was worried about Luke and his impending surgery. I started to get very bad feelings and worried about the risks. I had a lot of confidence that nothing would be wrong, but got scared as the day got closer.

The morning of surgery, I woke up in the middle of the night. I looked at the clock, 3:33. OK. Everything was going to be okay. We got up early and went to the hospital. We were the first ones there. Luke clung to me the whole time.

Luke waiting for Dr Gearhart to arrive

When it came time for surgery, Luke was calm. He went with Marcia back into the room for anesthesia. Marcia said he did well.

Headed back for anesthesia

While he was in surgery, I felt good about it. I wasn’t a nervous wreck. Neither was Marcia. We have confidence in Luke’s surgeon. So, when the surgeon called us out of the waiting room, we knew it was good news and that everything was okay. And it was. Luke did great.

Luke in recovery

It is three days after surgery, and he is doing great. He has tolerated all of the pain. It is almost as if nothing happened to him.

Before the surgery, I prayed. I prayed for Grandmom and Grandpop to watch over him. I felt that they heard me. I don’t talk to them. I don’t ask for their help much anymore. In fact, I think this is the first time I’ve ever asked for help from Grandmom. But, I think they listened. I felt comforted.


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Regrets

There are some things in life you cannot undo, or cannot unsay.  Today, I did both.  Who new that milk jugs were so explosive when slammed down on the kitchen counter.  I won’t put in writing what I said.  I’m too embarrassed to even think how low I was today.

Is there hope?

I think there is.


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Wye River

Today was like any normal day, at least in terms of my activities.  When I got out of bed and tied my tie, I went to work.  Meetings, email, decisions.  But, while I was having my mundane day, something extraordinary was happening in my family.

It started over a week ago.  My father was getting nostalgic, and he wanted to do something special for Elizabeth.  He started taking her for 3 or 4 hours a day.  They’d go to the hardware store to buy 1000 feet of cord.  Or drop some eel traps off of Ft. Smallwood Rd.  Or assemble their trot line.  Or build their contraption for pulling the line up onto the side of the boat.  Or salting their eels.  Or baiting their line.  Or buying buckets to seal up all their equipment for afterwards.  Yesterday, they were at it most of the morning.  And Dad was still getting things together at 9 or 10 PM last night.

Today was the big day.  Dad had made arrangements to rent a boat for him and Liz on the Wye River, a 16ft skiff.  He knocked on the door at 4:15AM.  Liz went to the door, he put his arm around her and off they went in the darkness.  It had been almost 30 years since Captain Kennedy worked a trot line.  But he was in his element today.  He and Liz were on the water from 6:30AM til 3:30.  They hauled in a bushel and a half of crabs.  Big ones too.

When my mundane day ended, I got to realize what this was all about.  I came home to a crab feast.  Liz sat at the adult table with me, Pop Pop and Marcia.  We all picked crabs as Liz and Dad told us stories of their adventure.

As I cleaned up late at night, and helped my mom unload all the stuff from their car, it reminded me just how much of an adventure my father’s life has always been, and how he has always made it an adventure for his kids and now for his grandkids.  At work today, I interviewed someone for a User Experience director, someone nowhere near in tune with living life to the fullest as my father.  My father crafted the ultimate experience for Liz.

Unloading the car, I looked at all the contraptions.  I unloaded the weights that they made, that were tied to empty vinegar bottles which operated as buoys for the ends of the trot line.  They had cut ropes with loops to easily attach the buoys to ends of the trot line, designed for easy assembly and disassembly.  They had 1000 feet of trot lines neatly coiled in a bushel basket be bought used for $4.  The kicker was the trot line assembly crafted out of pieces of wood, cut cords, PVC piping, a garden hose hanger, some small metal pieces, and, of course, some duct tape.  Had it been me, I would have no idea how to do any of this.

A few years ago, I went fishing with George.  We paid money.  We went out on a boat.  Someone baited our lines, and we cast our lines in the water.  And pulled in fish.  George married into money.  And his in-laws bought a house on the bay, a pontoon boat, and crab pots and such so he can take his kids on adventures.  He takes his kids out, picks the crab pots out of the water, and his kids think they are crabbing.

Pop pop did something different for Liz.  She knows how to do it all now.  And she worked.  She assembled everything with Pop pop.  Went to the stores with him and got all the supplies.  Rigged it all up.  And worked the lines for 9 hours.  She earned her way.  And provided a load of crabs for the family.  She helped him haul it all in, clean up the boat, and pack up the car.  She did it all.

A special experience.  Much more than just a day of crabbing if you ask me.


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My Wedding Day

Some days you remember vividly.  Some days you can’t remember what you ate for lunch.  Well, I still remember ten years ago today from start to finish.  It was a great day.  The day I pledged the rest of my life to Marcia and we started to build our family.

It is amazing how much energy I had that morning.  Marcia spent the night at Joan’s so I was home alone.  I ran a bunch of errands, dogs to get beautified for pictures, pick up and deliver some of the flowers, etc.  Then off to my folks to get ready with the boys.

I remember the conversations in the back of the church with Whatley and Duke Fries.  I think George was more nervous than me (probably because he blew his load the night before).  And then Marcia arrived and we spent the rest of the evening together, in front of everyone that we knew.  It was grand.  That is the best word to describe our wedding, grand.

I remember the little things too.  11:30, giving the hotel grief because they didn’t have a room for David Kennedy.  “Call Jenny B!  Do you know how much I paid for this wedding?!”  Incidentally, the room was listed under Marcia Russo.

But I digress.  There have been many days in my life.  None have been more significant than this one.  We were young.  We did not have it all figured out.  We still don’t.  But we knew one thing.  We could do it together.  And we have.  And we continue to.  And for that I am blessed.  And for that I am secure.

And I am most certainly happy.

Our 10 year anniversary was supposed to be a return to Hawaii.  It didn’t work out that way.  But I don’t care.  We’ve got a better present…


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Welcome home Daddy!

I had a long day at work today.  I was at work until about 7:30.  When I walked in the door an hour later, Maggie came running from the other room to see me.  Daddy, daddy, daddy.  Giggle, giggle, giggle.  Hide behind Daddy, then run away giggling.  With her little pigtails.

Maggie and Noah welcoming me home from work

Some days I get home and the dogs are barking.  Well, that is a given.  The dogs bark every time I walk in the door.  Some days though I walk into a hornet’s nest, everyone grouchy, and it’s high tension until the kids go to bed.  Well, really til they go to bed, and then finally go to sleep after several trips to their room or yells up the stairs.

But tonight, I walked in the door late, and everyone was in a good mood.  Noah hugged Maggie.  Then he lifter her up, she was giggling.  Then Edie wanted in, so she picked up Noah while he was picking up Maggie.  They were all smiling and giggling.

Then, Marcia let me have my little Lukie while she got everyone ready for bed.  I sat him next to me while I ate my dinner.  And we made faces at each other.  He smiled at me a lot.  It was some night.


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Cold February Memories

(that melt my heart and make me laugh)

A lot has changed these last few months.  Luke is getting bigger.  And just the other day, he ate his first bowl of cereal. 

  Now Marcia is making her own baby food.  She is a chef I tell you.

Liz got straight As in school.  And she went to a lacrosse camp and won first place in a long distance shot competition; she won a stick.

Long Distance Shot Winner - Elizabeth Kennedy

Eden just got her third spelling test in a row back, 100% all around + the bonus words.  Basketball coming up this weekend and Liz is in the all star game.  Both the older girls are preparing for the lax season and finishing up basketball.  We’re thinking about whether or not to start Noah this year, but probably not, he’s too young.

Marcia is a fiend on the treadmill.  Her ass is so fine… damn.

Tonight, Noah got an awful hair cut.  Marcia and I gave it to him.  We used scissors and dog clippers.  Geez, I hope he doesn’t remember.  I clipped his ear and he cried.  Even through the drama, it probably looks better than it did beforehand.  A few more weeks and he would have been Justin Beeber.

Tonight I got home from work and Maggie was dressed as a hootchie mama.  Yes.  Her grandmother brought her some bootie-licious outfits.  Leather pants for a three year old.  And the jacket… seriously.  Marcia asked her to put it on.  It lasted about 2 seconds and Maggie took it off saying, “I’m too stressed to wear this.”

But the kicker tonight, the thing I really want to look back on and belly laugh, comes from the other side of town.  It comes from a psycho known as Barbie Siecke.  You see, Barbie had a crush on my older brother George in Kindergarten.  I guess she never got over it.  This week, Audrey took the kids out of town to go to Florida, and Barbie invited him out for drinks!  Really Barbie, really?


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I am a dad

I’m a dad.  Can’t say I’m the best dad.  Can’t say I’ve made all the right decisions.  I used to be pretty proud of the job that I do.  I am certainly proud that it is my job to do.  I love my kids.  I do what I think is best.

Kennedy family - Bethany 2010

But sometimes, I am not sure what is best.  I am not sure that I know what I am doing.  Sometimes we have to make decisions that will affect our children’s entire lives.  And we don’t have the time to ask them what they want us to do.  It’s got to be our choice as parents.  But what do we tell them?  What do we tell our other children?

I think back on my childhood, on my parents’ decisions.  How they raised me.  What they decided for me.  Are there things they didn’t tell me about?  Are there decisions that they made for me?  Maybe that I wish they had made differently, or maybe they made the right decisions.

Now, back to me.  I need to trust my instincts more as a father.  I have made mistakes.  I have not been persistent enough sometimes with things like school, when I thought I knew what was best for my kids.  And I let people in authority roles make decisions for my kids.  I am still not happy with those decisions.

When you find out that your newborn son is probably going to need surgery, and needs to meet with specialists, you need to trust your instincts.  And that is what I’m doing.  I still don’t know that I am making the right decisions.  But, I’m trusting my instincts.  And I’m proud of my actions.

I don’t actually know if I’ll ever talk to Luke about it, but I will do all in my power for him.  He is special.  He is my son.  And he deserves the world.  I’ll do my best to give it to him.  And all our other kids.  Nothing else really matters.